It’s been more than 3 months I have moved out of my home, my country…….. my comfort zone. Even though life has been a little difficult on the social front, it’s been on a slow improvement path. Meeting like minded people looked almost impossible in the initial months, but I have realized it’s only a little difficult but not impossible. Singapore is one country with a lot of expats and a lot of loners like me are looking to meet other people. It’s just about being lucky to bump into the right person.
While I have been spending time meeting strangers and trying to make new friends, I have also been spending a lot of time online keeping in touch with some old mates. One such friend is Bala, he’s a friend from school and we haven’t met in more than 10 years. He moved out of Mumbai much before I did. I don’t have too much recollection of our friendship in school days, but I remember he was like this dream child of every Indian parent. He used to be the class topper in almost everything and I probably hated him for that..LOL. We just happened to meet each other on one of the social networking sites and have been in regular touch for a few years now.
From the random strangers that I have been meeting in Singapore, I happened to meet this British guy, Dominic. Well I must say he is one of the most unbiased and easy going western guys I have met in my life. It doesn’t take too much for men to get along, just some common interests – booze, music, sports and girls! Dom has shown me a different perspective in life. He works only as much he requires to work, he has travelled and lived around the world. He has friends probably from every continent in the world. For him, life is not about slogging, making a fortune and having a family, but it’s about working smartly, travelling and experiencing as much one can in a single life!
During one of the depressing weekend in Singapore, I was trying to plan a short vacation for myself. This was before I had met Dom, but I had got some hints from Bala that he too was looking to go on a vacation. The first destination that came into my mind was Thailand – It has beautiful beaches, it’s one of the cheapest destinations around south east asia, and it has the most famous night life.
The most difficult part is to find the right people to go on a trip with. I hadn’t met Bala in more than 10 years, but I had a strong vibe that we would get along well and can have a great trip together. Even though it’s easier for men to usually get along with each other, it could work otherwise sometimes. One mismatch in the group could ruin the whole trip. We had to find someone who would fit the mind set – likes to booze, likes to go out partying, loves travelling and most important, should have the exact same budget as others. Little mismatch in the budget could ruin the trip for others. The initial few weeks that I knew Dom, I knew he could be a big spender and hence I was hesitant to invite him for the trip. However, over the weeks I realized he is extremely compatible and easy going. I asked him to join us and he readily agreed, the dates were fixed, the flight tickets booked and we were ready to head out.
So effectively it was a group of 3 men, from different cultures and different background, getting together for a single motive of having and a good vacation together. I was the common link between the other two guys and had this constant fear in my mind about how the other two guys would get along. However, I didn’t have to worry anymore after the first 10 mins that we spent together. It’s unbelievable how easily men can get along with each other. Within 10 mins they were cracking jokes and giving high fives to each other. We were ready to experiment with any food, any drink and any place that was visible to us and there was absolutely no conflict of opinion. The best part was there was neither any conflict of budget, we could mutually agree on how much to spend. The first night I remember all of us were drunk and we had fried grasshoppers from the roadside stalls in Pattaya. We were all high and laughing uncontrollably on God know what jokes! Even though none of us had spent too much time with each other in the past, we were like a group of best childhood buddies out on a vacation of a lifetime!
Couple of days into the vacation, I got a call from another school friend of mine – Bhumit, who is based in Singapore. He was keen to join us for the weekend, so we all headed to Bangkok together. We grew from being a group of three to four and still the synergy was unharmed. Between Bhumit, Bala and myself it was like a old school reunion. But all of use made sure Dom didn’t feel left out and it turns out it was Dom’s witty sense of humour that kept us cracking most of the time. By the end of the trip we had names for each other which I can’t disclose here ;)
I have had experiences of introducing common friends to each other in the past, so that we could be one bigger group and spend a good time together. However, it hasn't been as successful in the past. When I try to analyze what was different, the first thing that comes into my mind is – there weren’t any girls involved in this group. I am not trying to be sexist, but this is from experience. It just proves that men are much simpler creatures and more social, they have limited interest and it’s very easy for them to find and get along with people of common interest.
This is the first time I got a chance to get a group of men together for a trip and it has been by far the best trip of my life. There were some not so pleasant experiences at the place, however what made the trip really memorable is the company. All it takes is a group of men with good sense of humour, some common interest and a lot of alcohol!!! To Bala, Dom and Bhumit.. Thanks for being the person you are… Cheers!!!!
